Didn't log in with anything specific in mind to write about. So I'm going to ramble for a minute and see if anything comes out...
I've been doing some great heart learning lately. God has used some challenging circumstances to highlight some things within me. Though these reflections aren't always easy to see/hear...they are providing me insight into myself so that I can change patterns that I'm not comfortable with. I know it's sort of ambiguous, but specifics aren't important.
I'm a little leary to put this out there. So I'll do the disclaimer first. I'm pretty sensitive to issues pertaining to my girth. I joke...but that's generally so that people know that I know that I'm too fat...humor is good that way;-) I also have appropriate people in positions of accountability and encouragement...so I don't share this in the hopes that people everywhere I go will comment on my eating habits. And finally, I don't share this so that anyone will be watching for progress and feel the need to comment.
So why am I writing this? Because I'm excited about it...it's a big piece of my learning and development at this point...and maybe somehow, I can encourage others.
I hit the wall about 5 weeks ago. I've been there before, but various stresses like new children, looking for a new job, moving, etc. captured more of my attention than my health. But a little bit of margin snuck into my life, allowing me to look more closely at choices that I've been making. And I just wasn't happy. That's the wall...I've had enough. It's actually a good place to be because it motivates change much more effectively than guilt and shame.
I began a change in my eating habits. There are some things that I just don't eat anymore...maybe when I was 50 pounds lighter and much younger it was ok. They just aren't ok any more. Though I will miss some of my old friends...they weren't good friends, so I'm better off without them. So my eating is different. I'm not going to share the plan...but I do have a plan. If you want more details, let me know.
I'm also exercising 4-5 times per week. I was motivated by a friend from college (shout out to don!). He connected me with coolrunning.com and the couch-to-5k running plan. In 9 weeks, anyone can go from couch potato to running 5k without stopping. I took the challenge and am in week 6...I skipped a little because it was just too slow at first. But I'm trying to pace myself so I don't blow me knees. So far so good.
I've turned the corner to the point where I feel better on the days I run than on the days I don't. That's a good feeling and part of what makes it worth it.
Why did I do this?
1. I want to raise my own children if at all possible. I know I could still get hit by a bus, but I'm not going to let my heart stop my parenting.
2. There is no way I'm going to let Heidi marry that doctor!!! I'm keeping her for myself!!
3. There is no way I can teach about self-control and discipline if I obviously don't have much. It's a spiritual matter.
4. God gave me this body. I'm not treating it very well. Sorry about that, God.
5. I'm too cheap to by new and bigger clothes. If I get the "big boy" clothes, they cost more. I'm too cheap.
6. I work hard. I can't afford to be tired and drained in my day. I need to make too many decisions that impact people. I need to manage my energy in the most effective way possible.
So, there are many reasons. I've got goals. I've got a plan. I'm working the plan and meeting the goals. I'm encouraged...and I haven't even lost enough weight for anyone to really even notice. But I do and I keep telling Heidi every Monday when I weigh in...
Anyway...that's a bit of my life. I think I'm good with sharing that...too late now!
Peace,
Matt
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3 comments:
Hi there! Random blogger hitting the Next Blog button. Fellow believer. Yeah! I really appreciate this post and how you express yourself on this issue. I relate to almost all of your reasons for the lifestyle changes. (I'm not that cheap but the idea of buying the next size clothes is daunting.) May God bless you as you continue to face this challenge.
You must know how amazingly proud (and protective) I am of you and your transparency. You honor the children and me daily with your decisions. Thank you, but don't get too skinny. I don't want some scrawny man. Give me someone who can weather a cold winter with me! I love you.
Best of luck to you. I was and still am in the same boat, and was generally unhappy with the condition I was in last January.
I have heard that change can be difficult. However, everything just clicked when I began working out again. It infused itself in every other part of my life, and it is not a chore but an intense blessing. That being said, change was easy.
Small attainable goals and huge goals to keep you humble. That's the key to shedding the blubber. Keep it up, you will definately love the results.
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