In one of my last posts, I mentioned that I'm making some lifestyle changes that should impact my health, girth, and longevity. In that, I also mentioned that I tend to be pretty sheepish about the whole thing. As I've thought more about that, I think I tend to be sheepish in part because I make bad choices and feel a certain amount of shame. I'm not proud of my weight...so I tend to either joke about it (if I can call myself fat, then your observation can be deflected) or avoid it.
I'm still not proud of my weight...it should never have gotten here. A friend posted on his blog that he stepped on his scale and it read 247. He decided to do something about that because his scale only went to 250. My answer is...time for a new scale!
But I've been adjusting several things in my life. And I am proud of that.
If someone is addicted to alcohol...they can just avoid drinking it for the rest of their life. In the same way, most people who are addicted to something can choose to just avoid it. But if you're addicted to food (using it for something other than nurishment), you can't just stop eating...at least you shouldn't. You have to eat. So it forces some issues that are unique. But I'm making different choices...and feel the grip of food loosening. Like the guy at AA who introduces himself as an alcoholic even though he's been dry for 23 years, I must always face the demons in my closet and cannot open the door any further than I absolutely have to. I'm encouraged by the progress there.
I've been running (actaully, jogging and walking)...working my way up to a 5k run. I'm encouraged by my progress. Today, I had a good run...went for over 25 minutes without walking. I thought I was doing great...until I was lapped by a guy clearly in his 50s...oh well...pretty good for the chubby guy who just started (see...it can be effective at dodging stuff). But I'm encouraged.
And when I stepped on the scale this morning for my official Monday morning weigh-in...I passed a huge mile marker for me...I've lost over 20 pounds! There is a whole lot more to go...but that was a biggie for me.
It's hard work. I don't always see the progress that I want. But I'm seeing results...and that will keep me coming back. I know there's a wall coming here sometime, but I plan to bust through and keep going.
At this point, I weigh less (barely) than I did when I arrived here...
I share that to give you a little glimpse of something that I'm encouraged by. I also know there are people reading this who shared with me their desire to take some of the same steps. So I write this to say, "Press on!" It's worth it.
Peace,
Matt
Monday, July 31, 2006
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
ambition...
Is ambition consistent with following Jesus?
That was the question posed last night in our Small Group. Frankly, I'm a little torn about the answer.
It seems like the picture of Christianity in the church often is very docile...nice guys sitting in a room together doing whatever seems to come up. But I'm not sure this is the picture of Jesus. I think Jesus was very ambitious...he knew that he had a limited amount of time to accomplish His Father's will...which led him to the cross.
But in my mind, ambition often leads one to greater and greater achievement, responsibility, and the attention of others. Jesus' ambition drove him to a disgraceful death. Yes his life was filled with strategic investment of time and energy.
So, in some ways, ambition seems very consistent with following Jesus. Yet not a selfish ambition (which is the point I think James is making in James chapter 3 of the New Testament). It's an ambition to please the Father.
Ambition people make intentional, strategic decisions in how they spend time, money, energy. For example, great athletes spend everything on acheiving greatness in their field...everything they do moves them in that direction.
What would it look like for a follow of Jesus to be so ambitious that everything they did moved them close to Christ and the will of the Father? What if all my time, energy, money...everything was for that one goal?
I think that would be pretty ambition, don't you?
I'm a pretty driven person. I wrestle with that a lot in my own spirit. There are parts of that drive that aren't healthy. But some of that is just born in me. Understanding godly ambition means that I get to be who God made me to be by letting His Spirit harness it for His purposes, not my own.
That's good news to me...
Peace,
Matt
That was the question posed last night in our Small Group. Frankly, I'm a little torn about the answer.
It seems like the picture of Christianity in the church often is very docile...nice guys sitting in a room together doing whatever seems to come up. But I'm not sure this is the picture of Jesus. I think Jesus was very ambitious...he knew that he had a limited amount of time to accomplish His Father's will...which led him to the cross.
But in my mind, ambition often leads one to greater and greater achievement, responsibility, and the attention of others. Jesus' ambition drove him to a disgraceful death. Yes his life was filled with strategic investment of time and energy.
So, in some ways, ambition seems very consistent with following Jesus. Yet not a selfish ambition (which is the point I think James is making in James chapter 3 of the New Testament). It's an ambition to please the Father.
Ambition people make intentional, strategic decisions in how they spend time, money, energy. For example, great athletes spend everything on acheiving greatness in their field...everything they do moves them in that direction.
What would it look like for a follow of Jesus to be so ambitious that everything they did moved them close to Christ and the will of the Father? What if all my time, energy, money...everything was for that one goal?
I think that would be pretty ambition, don't you?
I'm a pretty driven person. I wrestle with that a lot in my own spirit. There are parts of that drive that aren't healthy. But some of that is just born in me. Understanding godly ambition means that I get to be who God made me to be by letting His Spirit harness it for His purposes, not my own.
That's good news to me...
Peace,
Matt
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
thought spatter...
There are many things on my mind these days...here's a spattering of them...
- Several words of encouragement on the weigh-loss front. Thanks. I spend much of my time being encouraged about the process. Yesterday's "official" weigh-in didn't turn out as well as previous weeks. I checked again today and it's much better. I don't get too yanked about specifics, but I watch trends...trends are good. I'm running a lot more than walking these days. I feel the difference.
- I felt like crap on Sunday. Things came together well except my stuff. Not sure what it was, but I felt like my message presentation was one of the worst that I can remember. And for those of you who remember worse...go ahead and keep that to yourself;-) There were several high points, but I was heavy with a lot of discouragement about my own contribution to the gathering. I don't like that at all. Again, I'm putting this out there for the sake of transparency, not to get any kind of response. My hunch is that sometimes people don't realize that leaders/pastors can get discouraged, too. I don't go there often, but...this Sunday was a doozy!
- I think it's great that Tiger won the British Open. He's an amazing golfer and I love to watch him work. I loved the rare glimpse at the friendship between him and his caddie, Steve. Even the best of performers/leaders/athletes need someone to lean on at significant moments. Good on you, Tiger! Now quick crying and get back to work;-)
- Heidi works so hard at home. I can't tell you how much I appreciate her. Day in and day out, she answers the same mundate questions that numb the brain. She wipes away tears. She laughs at silly things. She breaks up fights before they escalate. She feeds. And she does it all with an amazing spirit. Heidi is amazing!
- I'm sitting in my office staring down another crazy week. Here goes...
Peace,
Matt
- Several words of encouragement on the weigh-loss front. Thanks. I spend much of my time being encouraged about the process. Yesterday's "official" weigh-in didn't turn out as well as previous weeks. I checked again today and it's much better. I don't get too yanked about specifics, but I watch trends...trends are good. I'm running a lot more than walking these days. I feel the difference.
- I felt like crap on Sunday. Things came together well except my stuff. Not sure what it was, but I felt like my message presentation was one of the worst that I can remember. And for those of you who remember worse...go ahead and keep that to yourself;-) There were several high points, but I was heavy with a lot of discouragement about my own contribution to the gathering. I don't like that at all. Again, I'm putting this out there for the sake of transparency, not to get any kind of response. My hunch is that sometimes people don't realize that leaders/pastors can get discouraged, too. I don't go there often, but...this Sunday was a doozy!
- I think it's great that Tiger won the British Open. He's an amazing golfer and I love to watch him work. I loved the rare glimpse at the friendship between him and his caddie, Steve. Even the best of performers/leaders/athletes need someone to lean on at significant moments. Good on you, Tiger! Now quick crying and get back to work;-)
- Heidi works so hard at home. I can't tell you how much I appreciate her. Day in and day out, she answers the same mundate questions that numb the brain. She wipes away tears. She laughs at silly things. She breaks up fights before they escalate. She feeds. And she does it all with an amazing spirit. Heidi is amazing!
- I'm sitting in my office staring down another crazy week. Here goes...
Peace,
Matt
Thursday, July 20, 2006
touching base...
Didn't log in with anything specific in mind to write about. So I'm going to ramble for a minute and see if anything comes out...
I've been doing some great heart learning lately. God has used some challenging circumstances to highlight some things within me. Though these reflections aren't always easy to see/hear...they are providing me insight into myself so that I can change patterns that I'm not comfortable with. I know it's sort of ambiguous, but specifics aren't important.
I'm a little leary to put this out there. So I'll do the disclaimer first. I'm pretty sensitive to issues pertaining to my girth. I joke...but that's generally so that people know that I know that I'm too fat...humor is good that way;-) I also have appropriate people in positions of accountability and encouragement...so I don't share this in the hopes that people everywhere I go will comment on my eating habits. And finally, I don't share this so that anyone will be watching for progress and feel the need to comment.
So why am I writing this? Because I'm excited about it...it's a big piece of my learning and development at this point...and maybe somehow, I can encourage others.
I hit the wall about 5 weeks ago. I've been there before, but various stresses like new children, looking for a new job, moving, etc. captured more of my attention than my health. But a little bit of margin snuck into my life, allowing me to look more closely at choices that I've been making. And I just wasn't happy. That's the wall...I've had enough. It's actually a good place to be because it motivates change much more effectively than guilt and shame.
I began a change in my eating habits. There are some things that I just don't eat anymore...maybe when I was 50 pounds lighter and much younger it was ok. They just aren't ok any more. Though I will miss some of my old friends...they weren't good friends, so I'm better off without them. So my eating is different. I'm not going to share the plan...but I do have a plan. If you want more details, let me know.
I'm also exercising 4-5 times per week. I was motivated by a friend from college (shout out to don!). He connected me with coolrunning.com and the couch-to-5k running plan. In 9 weeks, anyone can go from couch potato to running 5k without stopping. I took the challenge and am in week 6...I skipped a little because it was just too slow at first. But I'm trying to pace myself so I don't blow me knees. So far so good.
I've turned the corner to the point where I feel better on the days I run than on the days I don't. That's a good feeling and part of what makes it worth it.
Why did I do this?
1. I want to raise my own children if at all possible. I know I could still get hit by a bus, but I'm not going to let my heart stop my parenting.
2. There is no way I'm going to let Heidi marry that doctor!!! I'm keeping her for myself!!
3. There is no way I can teach about self-control and discipline if I obviously don't have much. It's a spiritual matter.
4. God gave me this body. I'm not treating it very well. Sorry about that, God.
5. I'm too cheap to by new and bigger clothes. If I get the "big boy" clothes, they cost more. I'm too cheap.
6. I work hard. I can't afford to be tired and drained in my day. I need to make too many decisions that impact people. I need to manage my energy in the most effective way possible.
So, there are many reasons. I've got goals. I've got a plan. I'm working the plan and meeting the goals. I'm encouraged...and I haven't even lost enough weight for anyone to really even notice. But I do and I keep telling Heidi every Monday when I weigh in...
Anyway...that's a bit of my life. I think I'm good with sharing that...too late now!
Peace,
Matt
I've been doing some great heart learning lately. God has used some challenging circumstances to highlight some things within me. Though these reflections aren't always easy to see/hear...they are providing me insight into myself so that I can change patterns that I'm not comfortable with. I know it's sort of ambiguous, but specifics aren't important.
I'm a little leary to put this out there. So I'll do the disclaimer first. I'm pretty sensitive to issues pertaining to my girth. I joke...but that's generally so that people know that I know that I'm too fat...humor is good that way;-) I also have appropriate people in positions of accountability and encouragement...so I don't share this in the hopes that people everywhere I go will comment on my eating habits. And finally, I don't share this so that anyone will be watching for progress and feel the need to comment.
So why am I writing this? Because I'm excited about it...it's a big piece of my learning and development at this point...and maybe somehow, I can encourage others.
I hit the wall about 5 weeks ago. I've been there before, but various stresses like new children, looking for a new job, moving, etc. captured more of my attention than my health. But a little bit of margin snuck into my life, allowing me to look more closely at choices that I've been making. And I just wasn't happy. That's the wall...I've had enough. It's actually a good place to be because it motivates change much more effectively than guilt and shame.
I began a change in my eating habits. There are some things that I just don't eat anymore...maybe when I was 50 pounds lighter and much younger it was ok. They just aren't ok any more. Though I will miss some of my old friends...they weren't good friends, so I'm better off without them. So my eating is different. I'm not going to share the plan...but I do have a plan. If you want more details, let me know.
I'm also exercising 4-5 times per week. I was motivated by a friend from college (shout out to don!). He connected me with coolrunning.com and the couch-to-5k running plan. In 9 weeks, anyone can go from couch potato to running 5k without stopping. I took the challenge and am in week 6...I skipped a little because it was just too slow at first. But I'm trying to pace myself so I don't blow me knees. So far so good.
I've turned the corner to the point where I feel better on the days I run than on the days I don't. That's a good feeling and part of what makes it worth it.
Why did I do this?
1. I want to raise my own children if at all possible. I know I could still get hit by a bus, but I'm not going to let my heart stop my parenting.
2. There is no way I'm going to let Heidi marry that doctor!!! I'm keeping her for myself!!
3. There is no way I can teach about self-control and discipline if I obviously don't have much. It's a spiritual matter.
4. God gave me this body. I'm not treating it very well. Sorry about that, God.
5. I'm too cheap to by new and bigger clothes. If I get the "big boy" clothes, they cost more. I'm too cheap.
6. I work hard. I can't afford to be tired and drained in my day. I need to make too many decisions that impact people. I need to manage my energy in the most effective way possible.
So, there are many reasons. I've got goals. I've got a plan. I'm working the plan and meeting the goals. I'm encouraged...and I haven't even lost enough weight for anyone to really even notice. But I do and I keep telling Heidi every Monday when I weigh in...
Anyway...that's a bit of my life. I think I'm good with sharing that...too late now!
Peace,
Matt
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
Life is...
“Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body. But rather, to skid in sideways, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming: WOW, What A Ride!"
Got this off a friend's blog...great quote!
M@
Got this off a friend's blog...great quote!
M@
Climate Change - more
I reflected on global climate change a few posts back. I've continued to think about the issue and would like to download some of those thoughts...
- (this is a Heidi thought) It seems like the Church is getting on board with creation care stuff. For the most part, I think that's great. For example, at Northwest, we use mugs instead of styrofoam cups -- cheaper and better on creation. But the Church is never good at moderation -- she tends to drink in excess at various wells. In the past, instead of challenging Christ-followers to think about issues pertaining to alcohol, she simply said that it was sin to drink. It's possible that we may see the same thing when it comes to creation care in the future. "Do you recycle?" "No." "Hmmm...you sure you're right with God?" I can see it now...
- Earth is a big planet. The solar system is a mammoth system with wide variety and dynamic causes/effects. It's a dynamic system in which we live. There is no such thing as constant temperatures. There is pretty solid evidence to suggest that the plant was much cooler than it is now as well as much hotter than it is now. There were glaciers and tropics in Pennsylvania. Climate change is a part of life on the big blue ball.
- The questions that remain (and are attached to opinion/agendas more than science) involve the rate of climate change and the causes of said rates. There is limited capability for conclusively determining these things. And it certainly requires more than a 50 year spread of research.
- The climate change issue is still tied largely to our own comfort and ultimate preservation. I'm faily interested in my survival and that of my species, so don't get me wrong. But altuism seems to stop when the conversation turns from caring for creation to preserving the way of life as we know it now. The "big scare" from the Al Gore trailer is that we'll lose a bunch of coastline in the world. Granted, that's a huge thing...but just because people will need to move inland doesn't mean that we're all doomed. Especially in America. That is a harder venture for poor nations. But it's not really the end of the world for us to have to adjust the way we do life. And keep in mind, this is just one paragraph and simply a reflection of my personal thoughts...it's not science...it's just reflection.
- I had the chance to talk with someone who is a scientist and, though not directly involved with issues of climate change, is pretty informed and well-read on the subject because it impacts his sphere of study. In short, he knows a heck of a lot more than me and has a good basis for his opinion. I enjoyed that conversation and am glad we had it. Here are some thoughts from that conversation:
- sometimes recycling does more harm than good. I put my plastic in a blue box. It gets picked up by a guy driving a huge truck, which runs on fuel. My plastic then needst to be driven to a recycling center to be processed. How much fuel was used to trasport my plastic? What are the emissions from that truck? If I didn't recycle, they wouldn't use that extra truck and cause those extra emmissions. Is it worth it? For me, it probably is. The truck that picks up my recycling drivings less than five miles to the center. In my area, it's probably worth it. In other areas, it's probably far less worth it. It's worth thinking about. How far does your recycling have to go? Is that worth it for you?
- this guy affirmed some of my thoughts about the big earth and the dynamics that have been in play for many many years.
- sometimes we respond to creation more to make ourselves feel better than to do what is really best for creation. For example, the recycling scenario where it produces more emmissions to drive the material to the recycling center...but we feel better for putting out Sunday paper in the blue box and don't think about the impact of the big trucks that drive the stuff.
Again, these are all just thoughts and reflections. I'm not a scientist. I don't plan to make a movie or run for President. It's a conversation that I have the luxury of having because no one in my family is dying of AIDS or disentary, I have clean water to drink, and relative safety in my community.
Peace,
Matt
- (this is a Heidi thought) It seems like the Church is getting on board with creation care stuff. For the most part, I think that's great. For example, at Northwest, we use mugs instead of styrofoam cups -- cheaper and better on creation. But the Church is never good at moderation -- she tends to drink in excess at various wells. In the past, instead of challenging Christ-followers to think about issues pertaining to alcohol, she simply said that it was sin to drink. It's possible that we may see the same thing when it comes to creation care in the future. "Do you recycle?" "No." "Hmmm...you sure you're right with God?" I can see it now...
- Earth is a big planet. The solar system is a mammoth system with wide variety and dynamic causes/effects. It's a dynamic system in which we live. There is no such thing as constant temperatures. There is pretty solid evidence to suggest that the plant was much cooler than it is now as well as much hotter than it is now. There were glaciers and tropics in Pennsylvania. Climate change is a part of life on the big blue ball.
- The questions that remain (and are attached to opinion/agendas more than science) involve the rate of climate change and the causes of said rates. There is limited capability for conclusively determining these things. And it certainly requires more than a 50 year spread of research.
- The climate change issue is still tied largely to our own comfort and ultimate preservation. I'm faily interested in my survival and that of my species, so don't get me wrong. But altuism seems to stop when the conversation turns from caring for creation to preserving the way of life as we know it now. The "big scare" from the Al Gore trailer is that we'll lose a bunch of coastline in the world. Granted, that's a huge thing...but just because people will need to move inland doesn't mean that we're all doomed. Especially in America. That is a harder venture for poor nations. But it's not really the end of the world for us to have to adjust the way we do life. And keep in mind, this is just one paragraph and simply a reflection of my personal thoughts...it's not science...it's just reflection.
- I had the chance to talk with someone who is a scientist and, though not directly involved with issues of climate change, is pretty informed and well-read on the subject because it impacts his sphere of study. In short, he knows a heck of a lot more than me and has a good basis for his opinion. I enjoyed that conversation and am glad we had it. Here are some thoughts from that conversation:
- sometimes recycling does more harm than good. I put my plastic in a blue box. It gets picked up by a guy driving a huge truck, which runs on fuel. My plastic then needst to be driven to a recycling center to be processed. How much fuel was used to trasport my plastic? What are the emissions from that truck? If I didn't recycle, they wouldn't use that extra truck and cause those extra emmissions. Is it worth it? For me, it probably is. The truck that picks up my recycling drivings less than five miles to the center. In my area, it's probably worth it. In other areas, it's probably far less worth it. It's worth thinking about. How far does your recycling have to go? Is that worth it for you?
- this guy affirmed some of my thoughts about the big earth and the dynamics that have been in play for many many years.
- sometimes we respond to creation more to make ourselves feel better than to do what is really best for creation. For example, the recycling scenario where it produces more emmissions to drive the material to the recycling center...but we feel better for putting out Sunday paper in the blue box and don't think about the impact of the big trucks that drive the stuff.
Again, these are all just thoughts and reflections. I'm not a scientist. I don't plan to make a movie or run for President. It's a conversation that I have the luxury of having because no one in my family is dying of AIDS or disentary, I have clean water to drink, and relative safety in my community.
Peace,
Matt
Vacations don't exist...
Yeah, the word "vacation" has been stricken from our vocabulary. They are not just trips. Vacation carries the connotation of rest, refreshment, and down time...at least it does for me. Before we had kids, Heidi and I would vacation in Vermont -- a great little inn near Rutland. We would read, sleep, eat, walk, sit in the hot tub...and do it all over again. My pulse slows down a bit just remembering it.
But this past week was spent on the road in another kind of adventure. Heidi, Rachel (a friend from Buffalo), and the kids went to West Michigan on Friday. They spent time playing with cousins and going to the beach. After worship on Sunday, I took a train north to catch up with them.
On Tuesday, July 4, we drove across the state and Canada and arrived in Buffalo, NY in fine time. We were given the gift of staying in the house we used to own in Hamburg. The new residents are friends and were planning to be out of town for the week, so they very graciously gave us the opportunity to stay there.
The first night was very shakey. The kids didn't sleep well. The parents didn't sleep well. Frankly, we debated packing up and going home at that point...that's how rough it felt during the night. We were kept in town by our love for our friends and a golf date that I had in the morning.
The rest of the nights went better. We made some adjustments on sleeping arrangements in the 2-bedroom home. That meant that Izak and Dad slept in the living room -- Izak on the floor and Dad on the couch. Decent sleep was had by all.
We spent most of our days at the Musielak pad. Rick and Carrie are soul-mate friends. It was a gift to simply share space with them. They have 2.9 kids, who loved playing with our 3...that was fun to watch. Much swinging was done by all!
We would venture out to catch up with a few other friends. It's a pretty small group of people that we spend much time with. Not because we try to leave people out, but because we have only so much energy and time. Many people there are close to our hearts, but our capacity is limited. That's hard for me (not speaking for Heidi).
We made it to Sunday morning, when we went to Hamburg Wesleyan, where I used to serve on staff. I love the people there. I left because of God's lead, not because of any hard feelings or frustrations. Walking into the place was a bit like coming home to me.
There is a large open area...foyer...called the "fellowship mall." Heidi and I put hte kids in their classes and began to connect with people again. It was such a gift to spend those few hours quickly touching base. Offering a word of encouragement here. Receiving a word of encouragement there.
I'm not a hugger. I put that right out there when I got to Northwest...who has respected that;-) But in case Northwest-ers think I am not a hugger just for them, be assured that I've never been a hugger. No less than 200 times did someone at Hamburg say, "I know you're not a hugger, but can I...?" It made me laugh...
It is a gift to have been a part of God's work at Hamburg. It is a gift to have so many loving people who welcome us and continue to pray for us. If you're part of that group...know that you are loved, missed, and appreciated for the time we shared.
After church, we jumped in the van and made a bee-line for home. We made Chicago in just under 8 hours. Then ran into traffic -- people returning from vacations, White Sox/BoSox game, and construction. Took some time to get through all that. So we made it to our driveway in just over 9 hours...not bad at all with three kids and an unimpressive bladder (mine)!
Now comes the chore of recalibrating to life at home. We'll all be off for a few days or a week...we'll see.
It's good to be here. Do I miss my friends in Buffalo? Deeply. But even more than that is my desire to obedient to my Master. He has given me the gift of loving and being loved well in Hamburg, NY. He's giving me that opportunity now in IL. Rarely do people experience that kind of goodness in one place. I have been given that gift in many.
It's a long post. But that's the gist of what's been happening for the past week.
Peace,
Matt
But this past week was spent on the road in another kind of adventure. Heidi, Rachel (a friend from Buffalo), and the kids went to West Michigan on Friday. They spent time playing with cousins and going to the beach. After worship on Sunday, I took a train north to catch up with them.
On Tuesday, July 4, we drove across the state and Canada and arrived in Buffalo, NY in fine time. We were given the gift of staying in the house we used to own in Hamburg. The new residents are friends and were planning to be out of town for the week, so they very graciously gave us the opportunity to stay there.
The first night was very shakey. The kids didn't sleep well. The parents didn't sleep well. Frankly, we debated packing up and going home at that point...that's how rough it felt during the night. We were kept in town by our love for our friends and a golf date that I had in the morning.
The rest of the nights went better. We made some adjustments on sleeping arrangements in the 2-bedroom home. That meant that Izak and Dad slept in the living room -- Izak on the floor and Dad on the couch. Decent sleep was had by all.
We spent most of our days at the Musielak pad. Rick and Carrie are soul-mate friends. It was a gift to simply share space with them. They have 2.9 kids, who loved playing with our 3...that was fun to watch. Much swinging was done by all!
We would venture out to catch up with a few other friends. It's a pretty small group of people that we spend much time with. Not because we try to leave people out, but because we have only so much energy and time. Many people there are close to our hearts, but our capacity is limited. That's hard for me (not speaking for Heidi).
We made it to Sunday morning, when we went to Hamburg Wesleyan, where I used to serve on staff. I love the people there. I left because of God's lead, not because of any hard feelings or frustrations. Walking into the place was a bit like coming home to me.
There is a large open area...foyer...called the "fellowship mall." Heidi and I put hte kids in their classes and began to connect with people again. It was such a gift to spend those few hours quickly touching base. Offering a word of encouragement here. Receiving a word of encouragement there.
I'm not a hugger. I put that right out there when I got to Northwest...who has respected that;-) But in case Northwest-ers think I am not a hugger just for them, be assured that I've never been a hugger. No less than 200 times did someone at Hamburg say, "I know you're not a hugger, but can I...?" It made me laugh...
It is a gift to have been a part of God's work at Hamburg. It is a gift to have so many loving people who welcome us and continue to pray for us. If you're part of that group...know that you are loved, missed, and appreciated for the time we shared.
After church, we jumped in the van and made a bee-line for home. We made Chicago in just under 8 hours. Then ran into traffic -- people returning from vacations, White Sox/BoSox game, and construction. Took some time to get through all that. So we made it to our driveway in just over 9 hours...not bad at all with three kids and an unimpressive bladder (mine)!
Now comes the chore of recalibrating to life at home. We'll all be off for a few days or a week...we'll see.
It's good to be here. Do I miss my friends in Buffalo? Deeply. But even more than that is my desire to obedient to my Master. He has given me the gift of loving and being loved well in Hamburg, NY. He's giving me that opportunity now in IL. Rarely do people experience that kind of goodness in one place. I have been given that gift in many.
It's a long post. But that's the gist of what's been happening for the past week.
Peace,
Matt
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